It has been almost two months since my brother's death. It still feels unreal to me at times.

Ara was often the first person I called to share important personal news. I still find myself wanting to call him. It takes a few seconds to realize that I can't. At that point, the pain feels new again.

He has always been there as my big brother. He has made an impression on me with his tastes in many areas, from music to ideas. During the last few years, we often discussed many theological and social issues on the telephone while he was stuck in California traffic. We differed on some ideas, but that never hindered our closeness or love for each other.

My brother and I have always been close. Even though during these last years we have been physically far, that closeness never suffered. We would talk to each other almost daily. He knew of our daily activities. He took an avid interest in the interests of my children. He always encouraged them in their success as well as their passions. He was not envious. He would take joy in the joy of others.

He sought excellence. He laughed easily. He was bright. He was conversant on many topics. He had a desire to learn.

I miss him very much.

I am reminded again to live each day to its full. Enjoy the life that our good Lord has given us. Love your loved ones. Have a heart to serve.

In the midst of this pain, there is still the good news that God is in control. He loves you and me, and sent Jesus to die in our place so we could spend eternity with Him.